Perceptions of Time

22 Jul

For the past four weeks, I’ve had no free time. I have been working continuously, grafting a way. I like to work hard, I’m of the belief that if you are doing something then you may as well put your all into it. If there isn’t any work for me to do I usually find some work for myself to do, I’m that kind of self- flaggellating person but that work ethic has been tested this past month…Getting up at 5:30 to work, then travelling to my actual job

to work some more, then travelling home and doing a few more hours work at night. Weekends have been spent working right across ¬†them. You’ll notice the word ‘work’ is repeated a lot in there.

In four weeks, I had one night off so I was beginning to flag and feeling almost robotic in my actions. On Saturday I finished this extra work at 16:32 and a weight has been lifted off me and in its a place a realisation of time and the depth it can hold, the value an hour holds to fill how you please. How the lacking of something makes me really understand the worth of that thing when I get it. I reckon our trials and tribulations appear in our lives to teach us so here is what I’ve learnt in the past four weeks.

1) There is much more time in a day than I think.

2) Time is relative to how much or little of it I need.

3) The essential things I put on my to do lists are really not that essential, they’ve waited for four weeks so I guess they are not that urgent. Forget living by lists. Well maybe not completely but a little less. (I feel I might self-combust as a person if I had to live completely without lists, in fact this post is nothing more than a glorified list.)

4) I can live with a bit of mess, it is not the end of the world.

5) I have the will power to work, and work, and work, so now I need to use that to work towards the actual goals I personally want to achieve.

6) Time away from the usual routine of your life gives you a perspective on that routine and how you can get more out of it.

7) Now is the time to rest and have fun, this is my reward for working so hard.
And importantly, this rest and fun will be all the sweeter and appreciated because of what came before it.

8)There is no short-cut to something worth having.

9) I can still function on a lot less sleep, even if I’ve been a whole lot grumpier.

10)¬†7 am now feels like a lie in- it’s all about perspective.

11) Time can easily be wasted and taken for granted.

12) There is something mighty and soul-affirming in the realisation that I have will power, the power of my will is enough and plentiful to keep me going, so what else can I do with this will power? I have plenty of ideas, its just following them through to fruition, now I feel like I have that ability within me to pursue something until the end.

13) Working towards a point is good and healthy and gives us a sense of direction but sometimes too much is invested in that point, always looking to the next thing instead of seeing what is here and now. Do we ‘ask what next?’ too much instead of ‘ah but now’.

14) Putting ‘real-life’ on hold whilst doggedly pursuing one sole thing is a good way to clear your mind of all the clutter and unnecessary thoughts that cloud ‘real-life’. I’ve had no time to think, I’ve just ‘been’ from one minute to the next.

15) Time is a bit like this…

'Reply to a Letter' by Tomas Transtromer

‘Reply to a Letter’ by Tomas Transtromer

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